Finding A Dance Partner

[NOTE: I wrote this on 22 November 2005. Its content still holds much relevance today.]

Two hands are needed to clap. Can you clap with one hand? Catch mosquitoes, maybe can. Unless slapping your fingertips on your palm is considered clapping.

Much has been said about the dynamics and intricacies of finding a dance partner. I can tell you from experience that it's not easy.

First requirement part one: Same/similar dance goals. On my side, I want to dance for social purposes only. Not for competition, not for performance. So if you want to compete, find somebody else. If we have the same dance goals, then we can continue one step further.

First requirement part two: Very important. Must have same free time. Or at least must be willing to make time for each other.

So many people say they want to improve their dancing, to be a good dancer, etc. But when I offer my time to practice with them, they always say no time.

I say, "Either you don't have time or are not willing to make time, it's the same thing. It means you are not going to get to practice with me. Same net effect".

What's the point of starting a partnership if one party is neither able nor willing to make time for practice? Defeats the purpose. Might as well say "I'm not interested".

Therefore it makes sense that both parts of the first requirement must be fulfilled before we can even talk about other requirements. Reasonable, is it not?

Other requirements that follow would depend on the persons involved. Examples:
* Height and physique
* Level
* Status
* Smoking or not

A little on these points:

Some girls require that the guy be taller than themselves. Especially for salsa where the guy spins the girl a lot. Whereas in International Waltz, due to the nature of the dance, the girl can be taller than the guy without much problem.

As for dance level, better for both guy and girl to be at the same level, or the gap is not too wide. So that they can do together the steps they learn in class. Too large a gap, and it becomes more like a teacher-student thingy.

Status means that either partner may or may not be married or attached to a steady boyfriend/girlfriend. Assuming that jealousy is not an issue (and it should not be), the main contention here is priority of spending time. Of course, someone married or attached will have first commitments to family or significant other, with time to dance taking a back seat.

Smoking... For non-smokers, they may find it uncomfortable having to inhale secondhand smoke. And it's not fair to impose on one's partner, so better off getting someone who's a non-smoker if one can't stand smoke. (Myself included, I'd run away from smoky places asap).

After all has been said, I consider myself fortunate to have a dance partner for the past two months. Though we aren't going for competition, we make sure we have time for each other. We practice whatever we learn in class so that we will remember for a long time to come. Glad and appreciative is what I feel now. :)