What I wrote around 9 pm today:
"In three hours or so it'll be 2013. I can't say that 2012 has been a good year for me, but I'm not dead yet, and as long as my faculties are intact there's still hope no matter how slim. In a couple of hours I shall leave the comfort of home to do something productive, meaningful, and helpful; when I return next year, I shall have the feeling of contentment and satisfaction that I made a positive difference no matter how small. I'm glad that despite the nonsense that hit me from all directions, key parts of me still function. Bye bye 2012 and welcome 2013. Vaalga!"
I do have more to write, but I'll leave that for another time when I can sit down and slowly type out my thoughts.
Monday, December 31, 2012
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Road Trips: Why I Enjoy Them
I've always enjoyed road trips because of the feeling it gives. Having embarked on a journey of a thousand miles before, I look forward to the next drive be it on a familiar or unfamiliar route.
The most important thing is preparation. Yes, you need to ensure that you're in good physical and mental condition for driving long hours. You need to ensure your car or vehicle can survive the entire journey to and fro. You need to get proper supplies based on duration and environmental considerations.
In the past three years I've done quite a fair bit of day trips to places within an hour or two's drive of Kuala Lumpur. Tanjung Sepat, Bentong, Hulu Yam, Kuala Selangor, Sekinchan, Bagan Lalang to name but a few. It's possible to do Malacca and Ipoh but for these and further destinations I prefer at least a night's stay, and for places like Penang I prefer two nights' stay.
Driving along the Kahang - Felda Nitar - Mersing route at night gives many opportunities for seeing stars. Without any street lights or populated areas, the whole road goes pitch black when car headlights go out. Some might feel nervous but I felt entirely comfortable doing it a few months ago. It's just me.
The most important thing is preparation. Yes, you need to ensure that you're in good physical and mental condition for driving long hours. You need to ensure your car or vehicle can survive the entire journey to and fro. You need to get proper supplies based on duration and environmental considerations.
In the past three years I've done quite a fair bit of day trips to places within an hour or two's drive of Kuala Lumpur. Tanjung Sepat, Bentong, Hulu Yam, Kuala Selangor, Sekinchan, Bagan Lalang to name but a few. It's possible to do Malacca and Ipoh but for these and further destinations I prefer at least a night's stay, and for places like Penang I prefer two nights' stay.
Driving along the Kahang - Felda Nitar - Mersing route at night gives many opportunities for seeing stars. Without any street lights or populated areas, the whole road goes pitch black when car headlights go out. Some might feel nervous but I felt entirely comfortable doing it a few months ago. It's just me.
Transcript: Photography by Ng En Fook
This is a transcript of Mr Ng En Fook's presentation dated 5.9.1993. All credits for authorship of the presentation text go to Mr Ng En Fook. Although written in the days of film before the advent of digital cameras, his pointers and advice are still very much valid today.
[TEXT]
[Presented by Mr Ng En Fook on Sunday, 5 September 1993]
=====
(1)
At this Photographic Prize Giving Presentation Ceremony it is entirely impossible to transfer the know how all about photography to you all.
What little things I know of photography which I can remember, I am willing to share with you all. Because God's way of life in this world is "Love", so sharing my experience to you all is love too.
In your photographic competition here are mostly pictures of 'Static' subjects. The quality common to static subjects is immobility, they remain still unless moved by external forces.
Typical subjects for this kind are for instance:- Landscapes, seascapes, flowers and trees. Inanimate objects of nature are most man-made objects:- architecture, machinery, works of art, objects of daily life, posed portraits, fashion shots, still lives and reproductions.
Now let us find out what is photography.
WHO INVENTED PHOTOGRAPHY?
_________________________
Photography was not invented by any one man. It is the combination of the sciences of optics and chemistry. It is the result of investigation and discovery on the part of many chemists and other scientists. Some of the important discoveries were made more or less accidentally.
The word photography means:- _Photo_ means light and _Graphy_ means write. The meaning of photography in the dictionary is- The art of obtaining pictures by all the agency of light upon sensitive surfaces. Photography is picture language, the newest version of the oldest form of graphic communication. Unlike the spoken or written word, it is a form of communication that can be internationally understood. The essential purpose of photography is communication or are compelled -to inform, educate, entertain, reform or share some experience with others. Photography provides the simplest and cheapest means of preserving facts in picture form.
WHAT IS A PHOTOGRAPHER?
_______________________
A photographer is a person who takes pictures with his camera, to tell a story with photographs. Creative photographers are artists in the true meaning of the word - makes a deliberate effort to express what he feels about what he sees. Creative
pg 2
=====
(2)
photographers are found among amateurs as well as professionals. A photographer must tell a story with photographs. Imagination and creative ability are necessary to develop the original idea into an interesting picture story. Human interest often contains humor.
A photographer must be like a News Features photographer in a newspaper firm.
1) Can plan his picture and develop his idea anywhere, anytime and any subject.
2) Must be bold, _ability to plan_ expected and unexpected picture story:- Basic Idea (_Simple_)
3) In addition, he must have sufficient photographic experience to take care of the technical details almost automatically.
4) Or a News Photographer- requires sharp shooting ability, absolutely control of equipments, must know when to shoot and when to wait, a keen sense of timing and a developed sense of news judgment is essential.
_Referring to the subject of the photographer must have the ability to plan!_
From these three words 2) "_ability to plan_" makes me a press photographer. Before that I was a processor, that means doing photographic processing in a darkroom in the Information Department in Kuala Lumpur.
On one occasion during the funeral services of Sir Henry Gurney (U Joe's note: October 1951), I was given the opportunity to use a camera to do some shooting of the funeral service because at that time our department only had a few official photographers, so I was fortunate to be call to assist in taking pictures at my own discretion in St. Mary's Church compound outside and the state funeral parade along Clock Tower. So before I shoot any pictures at the funeral, I try to use my _ability to plan_ and ask myself if I shoot this picture would it be good for news?
Then after the funeral service, I went back to office darkroom to develop the official photographers' films and mine. When the processing of the films were dried and sent for the Editor to select a few pictures for publication in the various newspapers- to my surprise some of my pictures were selected for publication and from that time onwards the editor like my way in picture taking and whenever there is a shortage of official photographers I was given the chance to take pictures. As time passes,
pg 3
=====
(3)
I was promoted to be one of the official photographer in our department. Then I decided to take up a photography correspondent course in America to further my knowledge in Photography.
So you all see having "_ability to plan_" before taking any pictures will lead us to success.
Coming to photographic experience to take care of the technical details almost automatically the photographer must know his camera well:-
1) The lens that produce the picture.
2) The film that retains it
Its other components are merely auxillary devices that control the three operations by which a picture is made:- 1) Aiming 2) Focusing 3) Exposuring.
1) Aiming - Without an accurate aiming device, a photographer cannot accurately compose his subject.
2) Focusing - Focusing a camera means adjusting the lens-to-film distance in relation to the lens-to-subject distance to a point that produces a sharp image.
3) Exposing - Exposing is admitting the amount of light to the film that will produce a negative or transparency of correct density or a colour transparencies of pleasing color. Two devices control this:- 1) the diaphragm, a variable aperture built into the lens, controls the amount of light admitted to the film. 2) the shutter, in conjunction with the built-in timing device regulates the length of time the light is admitted to the film.
There are two types of shutters:-
1) Between the lens shutters
2) Focal-plane shutters are built into the camera.
What are the four principal factors that govern exposure in making negatives or transparencies?
1) The type of subject 2) the intensity of the light 3) the speed of the lens 4) the speed of the film
Five reasons for stopping down a lens in making an exposure.
1) To regulate exposure 2) to increase depth of field 3) to increase depth of focus, for example (a portrait certain part sharp and certain part blur) 4) To increase
pg 4
=====
(4)
over-all sharpness 5) To obtain selective focus.
What is the most important single qualification for a commercial photographer?
It is that the commercial photographer must be a good technician or master of his trade.
What is the best camera for a photographer?
The best camera is the camera that suits the photographer's work or suits one's need is on the basis of the following considerations.
The personality of the photographer.
The purpose of camera must serve.
The quality of workmanship of the camera.
The price the photographer wishes to pay.
Today the best suitable camera is the 35mm cameras for general use:-
The characteristics is- small, lightness, inconspicuousness maneuverability - prerequisites for fast and unobserved photogrpahing of people, action, and events.
Super-fast lenses are generally available only for 35mm cameras.
Broadly speaking - there are four main branches of photography - 1) Portraiture 2) Commercial Photography 3) Developing, Printing and Enlarging for amateurs and 4) Motion Picture Photography.
What degree of contrast is required in negative emulsions use for?
a) Portraiture - low contrast emulsions
b) Commercial photography - medium contrast emulsions
c) Copying line drawings - high contrast emulsions.
In commercial photography there are at least eight branches:-
1) Aerial Photography 2) Real Estate Photography 3) Legal Photography 4) Industrial Photography 5) Publicity Photography 6) Architectural Photography 7) Action Photography 8) Copying Photography.
As a general rule, what kind of pictures do most editors of newspapers and magazines buy?
Pictures as one that is original, dramatic, distinctive, romantic, curious, thrilling, unique, odd, apt to be talked about.
In commercial photography - where a 10 per cent distortion cannot be tolerate.
pg 5
=====
(5)
Distortion is not caused by the lens but the angles involved.
The most general method of minimizing this trouble is to reduce the angular field covered by the lens by moving the camera farther from the subject.
Wide-angle distortion cannot be corrected by camera swings.
Lens coverage depends on 1) Focal length. 2) Angular field.
1) Focal length- centre of lens to camera field.
2) Angular field- (the degree of coverage)
Lens coverage is greater with short focal length.
Example 4" by 5" negatives:-
1) Long focal length 12 inches = 31º - 50º
2) Short focal length 5 inches = 80º - 110º
A lens has a fixed angular coverage power.
When a lens opens full aperture less angular covering power.
When a lens opens small aperture more angular covering power.
Portraiture "smooth out" blemishes, etc (pimples not very clear) but at F22/vice versa - (pimples can be seen sharply)
What is the meaning of exposure Latitude?
This refers to the degree of over or under-exposure that can be tolerated and still get a good picture.
Why is it that when an image is projected on the focal plane, the image turns upside down?
The lens optics are such that the lens reverses the image as it passes through (In other words - light travels straight)
_Meters_ - In-camera meters measure a subject to produce an 18% grey.
As an example, measure an 18% grey card under subject lighting and you will produce a negative exposed for mid tones which will also (depending on development) render a printable black and white or colour (on the average) give the correct reading for calculating exposure.
Under the same lighting, measure a black surface and the meter will recommend opening the lens approximately two stops. It is giving you the exposure which would render the surface as an 18% grey.
pg 6
=====
(6)
Conversely, measure a white surface and the opposite will be true. The meter will now recommend closing down approximately two stops from 18% grey reading - producing a negative which will print the white as a 10% grey.
Therefore, best results will be achieved by measuring exposure from an 18% grey card with an in-camera meter.
An incident meter will automatically give an approximate reading for a mid-tone negative, as it too reads the light required for an 18% grey.
Practically used by me for this 40 years in photography - Practical and fast way (measure by the back of my palm).
To buy a camera to suit an individual, three things must be remembered.
1) The Focal Length of the lens. 2) The Relative aperture and shutter speed. 3) Covering power of the lens.
_On Films_:- A photographer must be familiar with these qualities.
1) Type and base. 2) size. 3) color sensitivity. 4) speed 5) definition and 6) gradation.- to evaluate any type of film and determine which is best for his kind of work.
Where should sensitive photographic films be stored?
It should be stored in a cool, dry location where it can be protected from heat, gases, such as motor exhaust gas, coal gas, hot places and dampness.
COMPOSITION
___________
What is photographic composition?
Photographic composition is simply the arrangement of subjects within the picture area. Refer to photostat copies on composition.
Three basic principles of composition for the photographer.
1) A picture should be simple
2) A picture should have a centre of interest.
3) A picture should make good use of leading lines of movement.
_The 4 strong points of composition_
[Graphic]
Where to place the centre of interest
The most powerful and attention drawing of these is the top left intersection.
pg 7
=====
(7)
[Graphic]
Never divide the picture into two equal parts by dividing vertical line because the eye will be confused as to which half is more important.
[Graphic]
Notice that this diagram is much more visually pleasing than the former because the centre of interest is on a "strong" point of composition.
[Graphic]
Balance of Tonal Masses:-
Heavy tonal mass on one edge appears off-balance, eye finding no counter attraction on the opposite side.
[Graphic]
Balanced.
Light plays a strong point in composition.
Light and shadow become part ofa n arrangement.
In art there are two types of tone:- 1) Notan - dark light 2) Chiaroscuro - light & shadow.
Three general masses of tone - dark, middle adn light
Three points you should watch to be a successful interior photographer:-
1) Composition
2) Lighting
3) Details of subject
Composition of lines:-
Two types of lines - straight lines and curved lines
Straight lines suggest strength, vitality, security, power and masculinity.
Curved lines suggest femininity, gracefulness of movement, liveliness & sweetness.
A subtle curve is the most beautiful line - S curve - outline of a woman's body.
Three directions of lines:- horizontal, vertical and diagonal
Horizontal line indicates= repose, peacefulness, serenity, quietness & stability.
Vertical line suggests= height, dignity, courage, aspiration, slenderness & spirituality.'
pg 8
=====
(8)
Diagonal line gives a feeling of movement.
_Selection and Balance_:- The key to good composition selection
Emphasize it by 1) Tonal Contrast 2) Differential Focusing 3) Cropping
_Landscape Photography_
Normal rules must be applied:- lighting, composition, selection of filter, film developer combinations best suited to producing an attractive tonal rendition of a multi-colour subject.
_7 important factors_ 1) View point. 2) Composition (Refer to subject on composition) 3) Lighting. 4) Foreground interest. 5) Cloud filtering. 6) a frame. 7) people interest.
1)_Viewpoint_:- maintain interest in three distinct planes - foreground, middle ground and background.
2)_Composition_:- refer to subject on composition.
3)_Lighting_:- the interplay of highlight and shadow areas, gives the suggestion of relief and depth in a two-dimensional print. Control of lighting in landscape photography is as important as in interior set-ups where you can position lamps anywhere you like.
4)_Foreground interest_:- Any landscape picture should contain enough subject interest to have powerful, dramatic impact at the same time leading the viewer's eye into the rest of the picture.
5)_Cloud filter_:- A colour filter tends to absorb light of colours other than its own and transmit light of its own colour. In other words our eyes see things different from what is produced in the final picture.
6)_A Frame_:- Viewpoint with something to frame your picture between you and the main area of the subject. Like a branch curving in the foreground and some shadow on the ground.
7)_People interest_:- Include a figure in the landscape so that to show it is not depopulated or lifeless rural area.
pg 9
=====
(9)
TIPS
____
For any photographic competition in submitting pictures for judging, an 11" x 14" and etc. will be most pleasing compositional shape.
A newspaper photographer must be able to get results under all kinds of difficulties and be so well grounded in the fundamentals of photographic technique that the manipulation of the camera is practically instinctive.
For news photography to be published in newspapers - any pictures taken must have these qualities:- 1) Information. 2) Persuade and entertain. 3) Significant moment. 4) clean shave. 5) human interest picture.
Photography is not learnt from books but from taking photographs, making mistakes and taking more photographs.
_The Knowledge of Basic and Fundamental Photography
Written are what I know and remembered._
Photographer
Ng En Fook
[ENDS]
[TEXT]
[Presented by Mr Ng En Fook on Sunday, 5 September 1993]
=====
(1)
At this Photographic Prize Giving Presentation Ceremony it is entirely impossible to transfer the know how all about photography to you all.
What little things I know of photography which I can remember, I am willing to share with you all. Because God's way of life in this world is "Love", so sharing my experience to you all is love too.
In your photographic competition here are mostly pictures of 'Static' subjects. The quality common to static subjects is immobility, they remain still unless moved by external forces.
Typical subjects for this kind are for instance:- Landscapes, seascapes, flowers and trees. Inanimate objects of nature are most man-made objects:- architecture, machinery, works of art, objects of daily life, posed portraits, fashion shots, still lives and reproductions.
Now let us find out what is photography.
WHO INVENTED PHOTOGRAPHY?
_________________________
Photography was not invented by any one man. It is the combination of the sciences of optics and chemistry. It is the result of investigation and discovery on the part of many chemists and other scientists. Some of the important discoveries were made more or less accidentally.
The word photography means:- _Photo_ means light and _Graphy_ means write. The meaning of photography in the dictionary is- The art of obtaining pictures by all the agency of light upon sensitive surfaces. Photography is picture language, the newest version of the oldest form of graphic communication. Unlike the spoken or written word, it is a form of communication that can be internationally understood. The essential purpose of photography is communication or are compelled -to inform, educate, entertain, reform or share some experience with others. Photography provides the simplest and cheapest means of preserving facts in picture form.
WHAT IS A PHOTOGRAPHER?
_______________________
A photographer is a person who takes pictures with his camera, to tell a story with photographs. Creative photographers are artists in the true meaning of the word - makes a deliberate effort to express what he feels about what he sees. Creative
pg 2
=====
(2)
photographers are found among amateurs as well as professionals. A photographer must tell a story with photographs. Imagination and creative ability are necessary to develop the original idea into an interesting picture story. Human interest often contains humor.
A photographer must be like a News Features photographer in a newspaper firm.
1) Can plan his picture and develop his idea anywhere, anytime and any subject.
2) Must be bold, _ability to plan_ expected and unexpected picture story:- Basic Idea (_Simple_)
3) In addition, he must have sufficient photographic experience to take care of the technical details almost automatically.
4) Or a News Photographer- requires sharp shooting ability, absolutely control of equipments, must know when to shoot and when to wait, a keen sense of timing and a developed sense of news judgment is essential.
_Referring to the subject of the photographer must have the ability to plan!_
From these three words 2) "_ability to plan_" makes me a press photographer. Before that I was a processor, that means doing photographic processing in a darkroom in the Information Department in Kuala Lumpur.
On one occasion during the funeral services of Sir Henry Gurney (U Joe's note: October 1951), I was given the opportunity to use a camera to do some shooting of the funeral service because at that time our department only had a few official photographers, so I was fortunate to be call to assist in taking pictures at my own discretion in St. Mary's Church compound outside and the state funeral parade along Clock Tower. So before I shoot any pictures at the funeral, I try to use my _ability to plan_ and ask myself if I shoot this picture would it be good for news?
Then after the funeral service, I went back to office darkroom to develop the official photographers' films and mine. When the processing of the films were dried and sent for the Editor to select a few pictures for publication in the various newspapers- to my surprise some of my pictures were selected for publication and from that time onwards the editor like my way in picture taking and whenever there is a shortage of official photographers I was given the chance to take pictures. As time passes,
pg 3
=====
(3)
I was promoted to be one of the official photographer in our department. Then I decided to take up a photography correspondent course in America to further my knowledge in Photography.
So you all see having "_ability to plan_" before taking any pictures will lead us to success.
Coming to photographic experience to take care of the technical details almost automatically the photographer must know his camera well:-
1) The lens that produce the picture.
2) The film that retains it
Its other components are merely auxillary devices that control the three operations by which a picture is made:- 1) Aiming 2) Focusing 3) Exposuring.
1) Aiming - Without an accurate aiming device, a photographer cannot accurately compose his subject.
2) Focusing - Focusing a camera means adjusting the lens-to-film distance in relation to the lens-to-subject distance to a point that produces a sharp image.
3) Exposing - Exposing is admitting the amount of light to the film that will produce a negative or transparency of correct density or a colour transparencies of pleasing color. Two devices control this:- 1) the diaphragm, a variable aperture built into the lens, controls the amount of light admitted to the film. 2) the shutter, in conjunction with the built-in timing device regulates the length of time the light is admitted to the film.
There are two types of shutters:-
1) Between the lens shutters
2) Focal-plane shutters are built into the camera.
What are the four principal factors that govern exposure in making negatives or transparencies?
1) The type of subject 2) the intensity of the light 3) the speed of the lens 4) the speed of the film
Five reasons for stopping down a lens in making an exposure.
1) To regulate exposure 2) to increase depth of field 3) to increase depth of focus, for example (a portrait certain part sharp and certain part blur) 4) To increase
pg 4
=====
(4)
over-all sharpness 5) To obtain selective focus.
What is the most important single qualification for a commercial photographer?
It is that the commercial photographer must be a good technician or master of his trade.
What is the best camera for a photographer?
The best camera is the camera that suits the photographer's work or suits one's need is on the basis of the following considerations.
The personality of the photographer.
The purpose of camera must serve.
The quality of workmanship of the camera.
The price the photographer wishes to pay.
Today the best suitable camera is the 35mm cameras for general use:-
The characteristics is- small, lightness, inconspicuousness maneuverability - prerequisites for fast and unobserved photogrpahing of people, action, and events.
Super-fast lenses are generally available only for 35mm cameras.
Broadly speaking - there are four main branches of photography - 1) Portraiture 2) Commercial Photography 3) Developing, Printing and Enlarging for amateurs and 4) Motion Picture Photography.
What degree of contrast is required in negative emulsions use for?
a) Portraiture - low contrast emulsions
b) Commercial photography - medium contrast emulsions
c) Copying line drawings - high contrast emulsions.
In commercial photography there are at least eight branches:-
1) Aerial Photography 2) Real Estate Photography 3) Legal Photography 4) Industrial Photography 5) Publicity Photography 6) Architectural Photography 7) Action Photography 8) Copying Photography.
As a general rule, what kind of pictures do most editors of newspapers and magazines buy?
Pictures as one that is original, dramatic, distinctive, romantic, curious, thrilling, unique, odd, apt to be talked about.
In commercial photography - where a 10 per cent distortion cannot be tolerate.
pg 5
=====
(5)
Distortion is not caused by the lens but the angles involved.
The most general method of minimizing this trouble is to reduce the angular field covered by the lens by moving the camera farther from the subject.
Wide-angle distortion cannot be corrected by camera swings.
Lens coverage depends on 1) Focal length. 2) Angular field.
1) Focal length- centre of lens to camera field.
2) Angular field- (the degree of coverage)
Lens coverage is greater with short focal length.
Example 4" by 5" negatives:-
1) Long focal length 12 inches = 31º - 50º
2) Short focal length 5 inches = 80º - 110º
A lens has a fixed angular coverage power.
When a lens opens full aperture less angular covering power.
When a lens opens small aperture more angular covering power.
Portraiture "smooth out" blemishes, etc (pimples not very clear) but at F22/vice versa - (pimples can be seen sharply)
What is the meaning of exposure Latitude?
This refers to the degree of over or under-exposure that can be tolerated and still get a good picture.
Why is it that when an image is projected on the focal plane, the image turns upside down?
The lens optics are such that the lens reverses the image as it passes through (In other words - light travels straight)
_Meters_ - In-camera meters measure a subject to produce an 18% grey.
As an example, measure an 18% grey card under subject lighting and you will produce a negative exposed for mid tones which will also (depending on development) render a printable black and white or colour (on the average) give the correct reading for calculating exposure.
Under the same lighting, measure a black surface and the meter will recommend opening the lens approximately two stops. It is giving you the exposure which would render the surface as an 18% grey.
pg 6
=====
(6)
Conversely, measure a white surface and the opposite will be true. The meter will now recommend closing down approximately two stops from 18% grey reading - producing a negative which will print the white as a 10% grey.
Therefore, best results will be achieved by measuring exposure from an 18% grey card with an in-camera meter.
An incident meter will automatically give an approximate reading for a mid-tone negative, as it too reads the light required for an 18% grey.
Practically used by me for this 40 years in photography - Practical and fast way (measure by the back of my palm).
To buy a camera to suit an individual, three things must be remembered.
1) The Focal Length of the lens. 2) The Relative aperture and shutter speed. 3) Covering power of the lens.
_On Films_:- A photographer must be familiar with these qualities.
1) Type and base. 2) size. 3) color sensitivity. 4) speed 5) definition and 6) gradation.- to evaluate any type of film and determine which is best for his kind of work.
Where should sensitive photographic films be stored?
It should be stored in a cool, dry location where it can be protected from heat, gases, such as motor exhaust gas, coal gas, hot places and dampness.
COMPOSITION
___________
What is photographic composition?
Photographic composition is simply the arrangement of subjects within the picture area. Refer to photostat copies on composition.
Three basic principles of composition for the photographer.
1) A picture should be simple
2) A picture should have a centre of interest.
3) A picture should make good use of leading lines of movement.
_The 4 strong points of composition_
[Graphic]
Where to place the centre of interest
The most powerful and attention drawing of these is the top left intersection.
pg 7
=====
(7)
[Graphic]
Never divide the picture into two equal parts by dividing vertical line because the eye will be confused as to which half is more important.
[Graphic]
Notice that this diagram is much more visually pleasing than the former because the centre of interest is on a "strong" point of composition.
[Graphic]
Balance of Tonal Masses:-
Heavy tonal mass on one edge appears off-balance, eye finding no counter attraction on the opposite side.
[Graphic]
Balanced.
Light plays a strong point in composition.
Light and shadow become part ofa n arrangement.
In art there are two types of tone:- 1) Notan - dark light 2) Chiaroscuro - light & shadow.
Three general masses of tone - dark, middle adn light
Three points you should watch to be a successful interior photographer:-
1) Composition
2) Lighting
3) Details of subject
Composition of lines:-
Two types of lines - straight lines and curved lines
Straight lines suggest strength, vitality, security, power and masculinity.
Curved lines suggest femininity, gracefulness of movement, liveliness & sweetness.
A subtle curve is the most beautiful line - S curve - outline of a woman's body.
Three directions of lines:- horizontal, vertical and diagonal
Horizontal line indicates= repose, peacefulness, serenity, quietness & stability.
Vertical line suggests= height, dignity, courage, aspiration, slenderness & spirituality.'
pg 8
=====
(8)
Diagonal line gives a feeling of movement.
_Selection and Balance_:- The key to good composition selection
Emphasize it by 1) Tonal Contrast 2) Differential Focusing 3) Cropping
_Landscape Photography_
Normal rules must be applied:- lighting, composition, selection of filter, film developer combinations best suited to producing an attractive tonal rendition of a multi-colour subject.
_7 important factors_ 1) View point. 2) Composition (Refer to subject on composition) 3) Lighting. 4) Foreground interest. 5) Cloud filtering. 6) a frame. 7) people interest.
1)_Viewpoint_:- maintain interest in three distinct planes - foreground, middle ground and background.
2)_Composition_:- refer to subject on composition.
3)_Lighting_:- the interplay of highlight and shadow areas, gives the suggestion of relief and depth in a two-dimensional print. Control of lighting in landscape photography is as important as in interior set-ups where you can position lamps anywhere you like.
4)_Foreground interest_:- Any landscape picture should contain enough subject interest to have powerful, dramatic impact at the same time leading the viewer's eye into the rest of the picture.
5)_Cloud filter_:- A colour filter tends to absorb light of colours other than its own and transmit light of its own colour. In other words our eyes see things different from what is produced in the final picture.
6)_A Frame_:- Viewpoint with something to frame your picture between you and the main area of the subject. Like a branch curving in the foreground and some shadow on the ground.
7)_People interest_:- Include a figure in the landscape so that to show it is not depopulated or lifeless rural area.
pg 9
=====
(9)
TIPS
____
For any photographic competition in submitting pictures for judging, an 11" x 14" and etc. will be most pleasing compositional shape.
A newspaper photographer must be able to get results under all kinds of difficulties and be so well grounded in the fundamentals of photographic technique that the manipulation of the camera is practically instinctive.
For news photography to be published in newspapers - any pictures taken must have these qualities:- 1) Information. 2) Persuade and entertain. 3) Significant moment. 4) clean shave. 5) human interest picture.
Photography is not learnt from books but from taking photographs, making mistakes and taking more photographs.
_The Knowledge of Basic and Fundamental Photography
Written are what I know and remembered._
Photographer
Ng En Fook
[ENDS]
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Sabah Hakka Parodies of Oppa Gangnam Style
I've encountered three Sabah Hakka parodies of the worldwide Korean Oppa Gangnam Style music video. Here they are for your viewing pleasure. Useful material for learning Hakka. The first and third have Chinese and English subtitles, the second has only Chinese subtitles.
ORANG SABAH STYLE (OPPA GANGNAM STYLE PARODY)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUNb4yBz9Ck
Published on Aug 27, 2012 by jackwhk81
Synergy Api Hakka Style (Oppa Gangnam Style Parody)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_uirm_XmFqk
Published on Aug 29, 2012 by framelessador
Sabah Hakka Style - Tian Long (Gangnam Style Parody)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ETi12I3Lbk
Published on Sep 4, 2012 by fpsabah
ORANG SABAH STYLE (OPPA GANGNAM STYLE PARODY)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUNb4yBz9Ck
Published on Aug 27, 2012 by jackwhk81
Synergy Api Hakka Style (Oppa Gangnam Style Parody)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_uirm_XmFqk
Published on Aug 29, 2012 by framelessador
Sabah Hakka Style - Tian Long (Gangnam Style Parody)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ETi12I3Lbk
Published on Sep 4, 2012 by fpsabah
Thursday, August 23, 2012
Passed the PADI Open Water Diver course
Yes! We made it! KF & I passed the PADI Open Water Diver course at B&J Dive Centre, ABC Beach Pulau Tioman over the Hari Raya weekend. We're happy with the achievement after all the hard work and effort put in. Moreover, the revision session with Mr Jerung at TUDM Pool helped a lot to get us familiarized with the needed steps.
Feeling glad to have achieved the mission objectives despite being forced to schedule matters at the worst of times. Even though there were some hiccups here and there, but nothing unsolvable with some little adjustments.
Also grateful and appreciative that important things went on smoothly and the worst case scenarios didn't happen. Not forgetting to be thankful for good guidance and feedback on areas to improve.
I'm also glad to know the answers to some outstanding questions despite some of it being unpleasant to the ear. At least I got some potentially useful suggestions and tips to improve on. For that, I appreciate. Thank you. You know who you are.
Feeling glad to have achieved the mission objectives despite being forced to schedule matters at the worst of times. Even though there were some hiccups here and there, but nothing unsolvable with some little adjustments.
Also grateful and appreciative that important things went on smoothly and the worst case scenarios didn't happen. Not forgetting to be thankful for good guidance and feedback on areas to improve.
I'm also glad to know the answers to some outstanding questions despite some of it being unpleasant to the ear. At least I got some potentially useful suggestions and tips to improve on. For that, I appreciate. Thank you. You know who you are.
Monday, July 30, 2012
Fast Service at Kajang Passport Office
One beautiful morning I brought Mom to the Kajang Passport Office for her passport renewal. Am impressed with the fast service from submission of documents and payment to delivery of the brand new passport. 1 hour 5 minutes from payment to collection :)
Granted, we had filled in the form beforehand, having downloaded it from the Malaysian Immigration Department website (http://www.imi.gov.my/). Brought the required RM300 in cash [Text added on 2012-8-14: , her expired passport,] and 2 passport photos as per stated requirements. One thing we left out was a photocopy of Mom's identity card (IC). No problem, got that done at the shop opposite the passport office.
With completed form and all other needed stuff in hand, we joined the queue to take a number. 1039. First we got called to submit the paperwork for processing, signing, and rolling the thumbs on the thumbprint reader. Okay, done in less than 10 minute after getting the number.
Next, wait another 10 minutes for them to call our number, this time for payment. Paid the required RM300 and the officer gave us a receipt, and mentioned that it takes 1 to 2 hours for the passport to be ready. Okay. Time for a break - reading newspaper, breakfast, hanging around the Kajang Bus Station building, whatever suits you.
Half an hour after payment, saw 1006 collecting her passport. Wow. She must have arrived at 7:30 am. I said to Mom, looks like your passport will be ready pretty fast. Sure enough, at 9:35 am they called her number. Sign here, check. Thumbprint reading, check. Check the details page to make sure everything's ok. Done!
So yes, I'm happy that passport renewal has become such a fast, straightforward procedure. Another plus point: Kajang Passport Office is open on weekends. Yes, that's Saturday and Sunday from 8 am to 1 pm, except public holidays. Isn't that great?
Granted, we had filled in the form beforehand, having downloaded it from the Malaysian Immigration Department website (http://www.imi.gov.my/). Brought the required RM300 in cash [Text added on 2012-8-14: , her expired passport,] and 2 passport photos as per stated requirements. One thing we left out was a photocopy of Mom's identity card (IC). No problem, got that done at the shop opposite the passport office.
With completed form and all other needed stuff in hand, we joined the queue to take a number. 1039. First we got called to submit the paperwork for processing, signing, and rolling the thumbs on the thumbprint reader. Okay, done in less than 10 minute after getting the number.
Next, wait another 10 minutes for them to call our number, this time for payment. Paid the required RM300 and the officer gave us a receipt, and mentioned that it takes 1 to 2 hours for the passport to be ready. Okay. Time for a break - reading newspaper, breakfast, hanging around the Kajang Bus Station building, whatever suits you.
Half an hour after payment, saw 1006 collecting her passport. Wow. She must have arrived at 7:30 am. I said to Mom, looks like your passport will be ready pretty fast. Sure enough, at 9:35 am they called her number. Sign here, check. Thumbprint reading, check. Check the details page to make sure everything's ok. Done!
So yes, I'm happy that passport renewal has become such a fast, straightforward procedure. Another plus point: Kajang Passport Office is open on weekends. Yes, that's Saturday and Sunday from 8 am to 1 pm, except public holidays. Isn't that great?
Down, down, down
At times it seems that one's life is a failure and everything is down, down, down. Feelings of depression set in and cause the downward spiral to become worse and worse. Triggered by a major setback or a series of unfortunate events, the overall effect can be debilitating.
Being down can manifest as a see-saw effect. Okay some days, depressed some days. It's a sick feeling to look into the future only to find no end in sight. Even if one is on the road to recovery, it's not a straight line going up. It's like a stock market graph going up and down. Relapses and flashbacks of down feelings happen if triggered.
What can cause it? The loss of a loved one or loved ones through death, divorce, accident, illness or any cruel factor. Failure in relationships, career growth, financial and material accumulation, or inability to achieve success in any way defined. Feeling less successful in life compared to one's family members, friends, peers, seniors and juniors. Stressed out by toxic environment and poisonous people. Receiving a major shock from bad news.
Left unchecked, these feelings of uselessness and negativity can drive a person towards suicide. Yes, the intention to end it all can manifest because one feels like a burden to society, family, and people. That's why it's very important to have at least one trusted person to talk to if one reaches this stage in life.
If you feel down and want to end your life because you can't see a way out, please pause for a while. Ask for help from someone you can trust. Seek help when you need it. Find someone you can talk to in confidence.
Being down can manifest as a see-saw effect. Okay some days, depressed some days. It's a sick feeling to look into the future only to find no end in sight. Even if one is on the road to recovery, it's not a straight line going up. It's like a stock market graph going up and down. Relapses and flashbacks of down feelings happen if triggered.
What can cause it? The loss of a loved one or loved ones through death, divorce, accident, illness or any cruel factor. Failure in relationships, career growth, financial and material accumulation, or inability to achieve success in any way defined. Feeling less successful in life compared to one's family members, friends, peers, seniors and juniors. Stressed out by toxic environment and poisonous people. Receiving a major shock from bad news.
Left unchecked, these feelings of uselessness and negativity can drive a person towards suicide. Yes, the intention to end it all can manifest because one feels like a burden to society, family, and people. That's why it's very important to have at least one trusted person to talk to if one reaches this stage in life.
If you feel down and want to end your life because you can't see a way out, please pause for a while. Ask for help from someone you can trust. Seek help when you need it. Find someone you can talk to in confidence.
Sunday, July 29, 2012
PADI Open Water Diver: Advice for Newbies
From personal experience, I strongly recommend those intending to take up PADI Open Water Diver to take the Confined Water Dives in their local area first before heading to the islands to finish up with the Open Water Dives. Why?
Because trying to finish up everything in 4D3N can be too rushed and may not be possible if there's any delay caused by bad weather or learners taking a longer time to pick up the required skills. Even if "zero to finish" could be done in 4D3N for those super fast learners, it's still very rushed and you won't have a relaxed on-holiday mood.
I shall say it again. Take your Confined Water Dives in KL, PJ, Subang, Klang or wherever is most convenient for you if you're in the Klang Valley. Do it after working hours on weekdays, on the weekends if you prefer, or during the day on working days if your schedule's flexible. Take a month or less, or a couple of months. It depends how long it takes for you to get used to clearing your mask underwater or opening your eyes underwater.
Only after you've familiarized yourself with those required scuba dive skills and your confidence level has gone up, then go to the islands. Too bad KL doesn't have any nice beach or decent diving spot within 1 to 2 hours' drive. The islands are all at least half a day's drive away or 1 to 2 & a half hours by plane. Might as well have an enjoyable, relaxed holiday, correct?
From an Internet search I came across a well-written article by "tjs282" on Yahoo Answers. A former full-time scuba instructor himself (PADI # 609394), he gives an excellent, helpful answer to the kind of questions asked by newbies on what to expect for first-time scuba learners. I've included it below for reference because I think it's a good one.
=====[The following by tjs282]=====
While you may well be the youngest person on the course, that's not necessarily a bad thing. By and large, the kids and teens I've taught have picked things up a lot quicker and easier than the older students, and tended to get less discouraged by any setbacks or difficulties. They can also thus act as a spur for the more nervous adults -- "if s/he can do it, so can I!"
The PADI OWD syllabus includes 5 classroom sessions, to review each chapter in the manual (i.e. the knowledge reviews), and do the 4 multi-choice quizzes (10 questions each) and final multi-choice exam (50 questions, pass-mark = 75%, or 38/50); 5 'confined water' (CW) sessions in a pool or shallow (<5 m) open water, where the instructor demonstrates the scuba skills you need to learn, and then you have a go; and 4 open water (OW) training dives, where you show your instructor that you can do the the skills without seeing a demonstration first.
Actual course scheduling is down to the individual instructor/dive centre, and depends on what facilities they have available, and when. If you're particularly concerned, it would be best to phone up your chosen dive centre and ask exactly how they are planning to run the course. To pack everything into 2 days without breaking PADI's course standards, my best guess would be that they're counting on you (and the other students) to learn all the theory on your own time, which will allow the instructor to limit the classroom sessions to just the quizzes and exam (which would take maybe 90-120 mins total, assuming no holdups), and concentrate primarily on teaching the practical dive skills.
The CW sessions can be run together to some extent (although the skills should be taught in the prescribed order), so they could do a CW session on one or (more likely) both mornings. That would leave each afternoon free to do 2 dives, but all dives are likely to be very short (maybe 20-30 mins) and shallow (max. ~10-12 m) for logistic reasons (when I was still teaching, we weren't allowed to take OWD students out for more than 2 open-water training dives per day, although this may have changed since). Please note that the above wouldn't be my preferred way of teaching an OWD course, but I was teaching holiday-makers in tropical resort settings, not local divers on weekend courses.
Regarding the DVD, PADI Standards do not (AFAIK) require the student to watch or own the DVD prior to the course. The DVD is an additional or alternative means of learning the theory (e.g. for people with dyslexia): it contains the same information as in the manual, structured in the same way, but with video footage, animations and a voiceover, rather than photographs, static illustrations and text. The only real drawback to missing out the DVD before the course is that it also includes video footage of every confined water skill, which may be easier to follow than the step-by-step descriptions in the manual (after each chapter). But generally, if you can follow the manual, then watching the DVD is not necessary -- and your instructor will (or should!) be doing in-water demonstrations of all the skills.
PADI Standards DO require that the student be issued with their own copy of the manual to keep, to allow him/her to review the basics after the course ends (e.g. once a year, and/or directly before a diving holiday). While your OWD certification is good for the rest of your life, regularly reviewing what you have learned (and routinely practicing the emergency management skills) is highly advised, especially for new divers and/or those who do not dive regularly. If you prefer to buy and watch the DVD in order to do this, rather than re-read your manual, that is up to you.
I wish you all the best for your course, and happy diving.
Source(s):
Former full-time scuba instructor (PADI # 609394)
Article from: http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20120407131738AAC7Lvt
Because trying to finish up everything in 4D3N can be too rushed and may not be possible if there's any delay caused by bad weather or learners taking a longer time to pick up the required skills. Even if "zero to finish" could be done in 4D3N for those super fast learners, it's still very rushed and you won't have a relaxed on-holiday mood.
I shall say it again. Take your Confined Water Dives in KL, PJ, Subang, Klang or wherever is most convenient for you if you're in the Klang Valley. Do it after working hours on weekdays, on the weekends if you prefer, or during the day on working days if your schedule's flexible. Take a month or less, or a couple of months. It depends how long it takes for you to get used to clearing your mask underwater or opening your eyes underwater.
Only after you've familiarized yourself with those required scuba dive skills and your confidence level has gone up, then go to the islands. Too bad KL doesn't have any nice beach or decent diving spot within 1 to 2 hours' drive. The islands are all at least half a day's drive away or 1 to 2 & a half hours by plane. Might as well have an enjoyable, relaxed holiday, correct?
From an Internet search I came across a well-written article by "tjs282" on Yahoo Answers. A former full-time scuba instructor himself (PADI # 609394), he gives an excellent, helpful answer to the kind of questions asked by newbies on what to expect for first-time scuba learners. I've included it below for reference because I think it's a good one.
=====[The following by tjs282]=====
While you may well be the youngest person on the course, that's not necessarily a bad thing. By and large, the kids and teens I've taught have picked things up a lot quicker and easier than the older students, and tended to get less discouraged by any setbacks or difficulties. They can also thus act as a spur for the more nervous adults -- "if s/he can do it, so can I!"
The PADI OWD syllabus includes 5 classroom sessions, to review each chapter in the manual (i.e. the knowledge reviews), and do the 4 multi-choice quizzes (10 questions each) and final multi-choice exam (50 questions, pass-mark = 75%, or 38/50); 5 'confined water' (CW) sessions in a pool or shallow (<5 m) open water, where the instructor demonstrates the scuba skills you need to learn, and then you have a go; and 4 open water (OW) training dives, where you show your instructor that you can do the the skills without seeing a demonstration first.
Actual course scheduling is down to the individual instructor/dive centre, and depends on what facilities they have available, and when. If you're particularly concerned, it would be best to phone up your chosen dive centre and ask exactly how they are planning to run the course. To pack everything into 2 days without breaking PADI's course standards, my best guess would be that they're counting on you (and the other students) to learn all the theory on your own time, which will allow the instructor to limit the classroom sessions to just the quizzes and exam (which would take maybe 90-120 mins total, assuming no holdups), and concentrate primarily on teaching the practical dive skills.
The CW sessions can be run together to some extent (although the skills should be taught in the prescribed order), so they could do a CW session on one or (more likely) both mornings. That would leave each afternoon free to do 2 dives, but all dives are likely to be very short (maybe 20-30 mins) and shallow (max. ~10-12 m) for logistic reasons (when I was still teaching, we weren't allowed to take OWD students out for more than 2 open-water training dives per day, although this may have changed since). Please note that the above wouldn't be my preferred way of teaching an OWD course, but I was teaching holiday-makers in tropical resort settings, not local divers on weekend courses.
Regarding the DVD, PADI Standards do not (AFAIK) require the student to watch or own the DVD prior to the course. The DVD is an additional or alternative means of learning the theory (e.g. for people with dyslexia): it contains the same information as in the manual, structured in the same way, but with video footage, animations and a voiceover, rather than photographs, static illustrations and text. The only real drawback to missing out the DVD before the course is that it also includes video footage of every confined water skill, which may be easier to follow than the step-by-step descriptions in the manual (after each chapter). But generally, if you can follow the manual, then watching the DVD is not necessary -- and your instructor will (or should!) be doing in-water demonstrations of all the skills.
PADI Standards DO require that the student be issued with their own copy of the manual to keep, to allow him/her to review the basics after the course ends (e.g. once a year, and/or directly before a diving holiday). While your OWD certification is good for the rest of your life, regularly reviewing what you have learned (and routinely practicing the emergency management skills) is highly advised, especially for new divers and/or those who do not dive regularly. If you prefer to buy and watch the DVD in order to do this, rather than re-read your manual, that is up to you.
I wish you all the best for your course, and happy diving.
Source(s):
Former full-time scuba instructor (PADI # 609394)
Article from: http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20120407131738AAC7Lvt
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Suicide of Lam Ho Kit (Kit Chai) in Hong Kong
Tragic suicide case of Lam Ho Kit 林豪傑 a.k.a. Kit Chai 傑仔 in Hong Kong. Struggling with depression, traumatized by the sight of his mother's suicide on 911 day, failure in studies, failure in getting a job, dashed ambitions, worried about how all this would affect his family, he followed his mom's footsteps by burning charcoal in a confined space. News video in Cantonese with Mandarin subtitles. English transcript follows below.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXAl9mmGmm8
Kit Chai... Waaaa... [wailing, crying]
19 year old Kit Chai committed suicide by burning charcoal
"I just want to be back at my mom's side
I'm tired, I'm suffering
Sorry... I love you all
Please forgive me"
10 years ago, on the day of 911
9-year-old Kit Chai came home after school to Tsuen Wan Centre Apartments
Originally mother and son relied on each other
But mother couldn't stand the stress of divorce
Committed suicide by burning charcoal
Kit Chai's fragile heart was deeply hurt
Afterwards, he followed his Kung Kung (maternal grandfather) and Por Por (maternal grandmother)
They moved to Tsuen Wan Fuk Loi Estate
Relied on Comprehensive Social Security Assistance for living
He did what should be done, he studied hard
Aspired to be a rescue personnel
However, his exam results weren't good
He enrolled into the Yi Jin Programme - Certificate in Uniformed Forces
And took an additional English course
But his results still couldn't meet the requirements for candidates
Two years ago, Kit Chai went to Australia for a working holiday
To learn English
Upon returning (to Hong Kong), Social Welfare Department staff told Kit Chai
He had to find a job upon turning 18 years of age
Otherwise it would affect the whole family's Social Security Assistance
Sadly, depression-afflicted Kit Chai
Still couldn't find a job in the end
Only by moving out alone
Kung Kung and Por Por could get HKD10,000 in Social Security Assistance
In two months
He didn't update his family members about his address
He moved to Tsuen Wan Tso Kung Square cubicle apartment
Last Friday after meeting with Social Welfare Department staff
He returned to Fuk Loi Estate for dinner
Perhaps due to being stressed out, he couldn't say anything
After that he disappeared for two days
Kung Kung kept calling him but couldn't get through
"I just want to be back at my mom's side
I already have serious depression mental problems
I can no longer pretend to be normal
I'm exhausted, I'm suffering"
19-year-old Kit Chai
Ended up following his mother's footsteps
Committing suicide by burning charcoal
Aunty, please let go of him
[Waaaa...]
Please come back, Kit Chai, Kit Chai... Waaaa... [wailing, crying]
[Maternal grandfather of the deceased]
Ten years ago my daughter, his mother, burnt charcoal
Committed suicide by burning charcoal, it was in the newspapers
Ten years later my grandson did the same
[Lee Tak Shing, Psychiatric Specialist Doctor]
A lot of times, young people misunderstand
Thought they exhausted their mothers to death, will have feelings of guilt
Even if they think that's a way of solving problems...
He said family members should pay more attention
To young ones who go through unfortunate experiences
When there's a need, should seek specialist help
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXAl9mmGmm8
Kit Chai... Waaaa... [wailing, crying]
19 year old Kit Chai committed suicide by burning charcoal
"I just want to be back at my mom's side
I'm tired, I'm suffering
Sorry... I love you all
Please forgive me"
10 years ago, on the day of 911
9-year-old Kit Chai came home after school to Tsuen Wan Centre Apartments
Originally mother and son relied on each other
But mother couldn't stand the stress of divorce
Committed suicide by burning charcoal
Kit Chai's fragile heart was deeply hurt
Afterwards, he followed his Kung Kung (maternal grandfather) and Por Por (maternal grandmother)
They moved to Tsuen Wan Fuk Loi Estate
Relied on Comprehensive Social Security Assistance for living
He did what should be done, he studied hard
Aspired to be a rescue personnel
However, his exam results weren't good
He enrolled into the Yi Jin Programme - Certificate in Uniformed Forces
And took an additional English course
But his results still couldn't meet the requirements for candidates
Two years ago, Kit Chai went to Australia for a working holiday
To learn English
Upon returning (to Hong Kong), Social Welfare Department staff told Kit Chai
He had to find a job upon turning 18 years of age
Otherwise it would affect the whole family's Social Security Assistance
Sadly, depression-afflicted Kit Chai
Still couldn't find a job in the end
Only by moving out alone
Kung Kung and Por Por could get HKD10,000 in Social Security Assistance
In two months
He didn't update his family members about his address
He moved to Tsuen Wan Tso Kung Square cubicle apartment
Last Friday after meeting with Social Welfare Department staff
He returned to Fuk Loi Estate for dinner
Perhaps due to being stressed out, he couldn't say anything
After that he disappeared for two days
Kung Kung kept calling him but couldn't get through
"I just want to be back at my mom's side
I already have serious depression mental problems
I can no longer pretend to be normal
I'm exhausted, I'm suffering"
19-year-old Kit Chai
Ended up following his mother's footsteps
Committing suicide by burning charcoal
Aunty, please let go of him
[Waaaa...]
Please come back, Kit Chai, Kit Chai... Waaaa... [wailing, crying]
[Maternal grandfather of the deceased]
Ten years ago my daughter, his mother, burnt charcoal
Committed suicide by burning charcoal, it was in the newspapers
Ten years later my grandson did the same
[Lee Tak Shing, Psychiatric Specialist Doctor]
A lot of times, young people misunderstand
Thought they exhausted their mothers to death, will have feelings of guilt
Even if they think that's a way of solving problems...
He said family members should pay more attention
To young ones who go through unfortunate experiences
When there's a need, should seek specialist help
Monday, May 28, 2012
Swim Venue: Kompleks Kolam Renang Awam Pusat Sukan Air Presint 6 Putrajaya
Swim Venue: Kompleks Kolam Renang Awam Pusat Sukan Air Presint 6 Putrajaya (Public Swimming Pool, Putrajaya Swimming Complex, Precint 6, Putrajaya)
Address: Presint 6, 62000 Putrajaya, Malaysia. (Next to Pullman Putrajaya Lakeside Hotel. Follow the signs to Pullman along the highway and you'll get there, directions may be a bit confusing for first-timers.)
Open Hours:
Tuesdays to Sundays
9:00 - 11:00 am
1:00 - 3:00 pm
5:00 - 7:00 pm
8:00 - 10:00 pm
Notes:
5:00 - 7:00 pm slot is "Women Only" on Tuesdays and Thursdays
1:00 - 3:00 pm slot is closed on Fridays
Entry Fees:
Adult Pool: RM2:00 per person for all ages
Children's Pool: RM2:00 per person for all ages from Tuesdays to Fridays, RM2.00 per adult on Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays, RM1:00 per child (11 years and below) on Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays
Please note that children using the Adult Pool will be charged the Adult fee of RM2.00 per person.
Other Details:
Pool Length: 50 metres
Pool Depth: 1.2 to 2.0 metres
Pool Setting: Outdoor (Very nice holiday resort feel and ambience)
Address: Presint 6, 62000 Putrajaya, Malaysia. (Next to Pullman Putrajaya Lakeside Hotel. Follow the signs to Pullman along the highway and you'll get there, directions may be a bit confusing for first-timers.)
Open Hours:
Tuesdays to Sundays
9:00 - 11:00 am
1:00 - 3:00 pm
5:00 - 7:00 pm
8:00 - 10:00 pm
Notes:
5:00 - 7:00 pm slot is "Women Only" on Tuesdays and Thursdays
1:00 - 3:00 pm slot is closed on Fridays
Entry Fees:
Adult Pool: RM2:00 per person for all ages
Children's Pool: RM2:00 per person for all ages from Tuesdays to Fridays, RM2.00 per adult on Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays, RM1:00 per child (11 years and below) on Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays
Please note that children using the Adult Pool will be charged the Adult fee of RM2.00 per person.
Other Details:
Pool Length: 50 metres
Pool Depth: 1.2 to 2.0 metres
Pool Setting: Outdoor (Very nice holiday resort feel and ambience)
Swim Venue: Kompleks Sukan Negara Bukit Jalil
Swim Venue: Kompleks Sukan Negara Bukit Jalil
Address: Pusat Akuatik Nasional (National Aquatic Centre), Kompleks Sukan Negara, Bukit Jalil, Seri Petaling, 57700 Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.
Open Hours:
Mondays to Thursdays
2:00 - 4:30 pm
5:00 - 7:30 pm
8:00 - 10:30 pm
Fridays
8:00 - 9:30 am (Free)
10:00 am - 11:30 am (Free)
3:00 - 4:30 pm (Free)
5:00 - 7:30 pm
8:00 - 10:30 pm
Saturdays & Public Holidays
8:00 - 10:30 am
11:00 am - 1:30 pm
2:00 - 4:30 pm
5:00 - 7:30 pm
8:00 - 10:30 pm
Sundays
8:00 - 10:30 am
11:30 am - 2:00 pm
3:00 - 5:30 pm
6:30 - 9:00 pm
Entry Fees:
Children (4 years and below): Free
Children (5 to 12 years): Mondays to Fridays RM2.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM3.00
Adults (13 to 54 years): Mondays to Fridays RM4.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM5.00
Persons With Disabilities: Mondays to Fridays RM3.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM4.00
Senior Citizens (55 years and above): Mondays to Fridays RM3.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM4.00
Other Details:
Pool Length: 50 metres
Pool Depth: 1.2 to 1.8 metres
Pool Setting: Indoor (Covered by tent-shaped structure)
Address: Pusat Akuatik Nasional (National Aquatic Centre), Kompleks Sukan Negara, Bukit Jalil, Seri Petaling, 57700 Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.
Open Hours:
Mondays to Thursdays
2:00 - 4:30 pm
5:00 - 7:30 pm
8:00 - 10:30 pm
Fridays
8:00 - 9:30 am (Free)
10:00 am - 11:30 am (Free)
3:00 - 4:30 pm (Free)
5:00 - 7:30 pm
8:00 - 10:30 pm
Saturdays & Public Holidays
8:00 - 10:30 am
11:00 am - 1:30 pm
2:00 - 4:30 pm
5:00 - 7:30 pm
8:00 - 10:30 pm
Sundays
8:00 - 10:30 am
11:30 am - 2:00 pm
3:00 - 5:30 pm
6:30 - 9:00 pm
Entry Fees:
Children (4 years and below): Free
Children (5 to 12 years): Mondays to Fridays RM2.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM3.00
Adults (13 to 54 years): Mondays to Fridays RM4.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM5.00
Persons With Disabilities: Mondays to Fridays RM3.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM4.00
Senior Citizens (55 years and above): Mondays to Fridays RM3.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM4.00
Other Details:
Pool Length: 50 metres
Pool Depth: 1.2 to 1.8 metres
Pool Setting: Indoor (Covered by tent-shaped structure)
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Swim Venue: Kompleks Kemudahan Kemasyarakatan (3K), Subang Jaya
Swim Venue: Kompleks Kemudahan Kemasyarakatan (3K), Subang Jaya
Address: Jalan SS 13/1 off Persiaran Kewajipan, SS13, 47500 Subang Jaya, Selangor Darul Ehsan, Malaysia.
Open Hours:
Daily
9:00 am - 12:00 pm
2:00 - 5:00 pm
6:00 - 9:00 pm
Entry Fees:
Adults:
Weekdays
Day Sessions RM2.00, Night Sessions RM3.00
Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays
Day Sessions RM3.00, Night Sessions RM4.00
Other Details:
Pool Length: 50 metres
Pool Depth: 1.2 to 2.2 metres
Pool Setting: Indoor
Address: Jalan SS 13/1 off Persiaran Kewajipan, SS13, 47500 Subang Jaya, Selangor Darul Ehsan, Malaysia.
Open Hours:
Daily
9:00 am - 12:00 pm
2:00 - 5:00 pm
6:00 - 9:00 pm
Entry Fees:
Adults:
Weekdays
Day Sessions RM2.00, Night Sessions RM3.00
Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays
Day Sessions RM3.00, Night Sessions RM4.00
Other Details:
Pool Length: 50 metres
Pool Depth: 1.2 to 2.2 metres
Pool Setting: Indoor
Swim Venue: Pusat Akuatik Darul Ehsan, Shah Alam
Swim Venue: Pusat Akuatik Darul Ehsan, Shah Alam
Address: Jalan Aerobik 13/43, Section 13, 40100 Shah Alam, Selangor Darul Ehsan, Malaysia.
Open Hours:
Tuesdays to Sundays
9:00 - 11:15 am
12:00 - 2:00 pm
3:00 - 5:15 pm
6:00 - 8:15 pm
Ticket counter closes half an hour before the end of each session.
Entry Fees:
Adults: Tuesdays to Fridays RM3.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM3.50
Other Details:
Pool Length: 50 metres
Pool Depth: 2.2 to 3.0 metres
Pool Setting: Indoor
Address: Jalan Aerobik 13/43, Section 13, 40100 Shah Alam, Selangor Darul Ehsan, Malaysia.
Open Hours:
Tuesdays to Sundays
9:00 - 11:15 am
12:00 - 2:00 pm
3:00 - 5:15 pm
6:00 - 8:15 pm
Ticket counter closes half an hour before the end of each session.
Entry Fees:
Adults: Tuesdays to Fridays RM3.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM3.50
Other Details:
Pool Length: 50 metres
Pool Depth: 2.2 to 3.0 metres
Pool Setting: Indoor
Swim Venue: Kompleks Sukan Negara Panasonic Sports Complex Shah Alam
Swim Venue: Kompleks Sukan Negara Panasonic Sports Complex Shah Alam
Address: Lot No. 4, Persiaran Perkilangan, Section 21, 40300 Shah Alam, Selangor Darul Ehsan, Malaysia.
Open Hours:
Tuesdays to Fridays
5:00 - 7:30 pm
8:00 - 10:30 pm
Saturdays & Public Holidays
8:00 - 10:30 am
11:00 am - 1:30 pm
2:00 - 4:30 pm
5:00 - 7:30 pm
8:00 - 10:30 pm
Sundays
8:00 - 10:30 am
11:30 am - 2:00 pm
3:00 - 5:30 pm
6:30 - 9:00 pm
Entry Fees:
Children (4 years and below): Free
Children (5 to 12 years): Tuesdays to Fridays RM2.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM3.00
Adults (13 to 54 years): Tuesdays to Fridays RM3.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM4.00
Persons With Disabilities: Tuesdays to Fridays RM2.50, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM3.50
Senior Citizens (55 years and above): Tuesdays to Fridays RM2.50, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM3.50
Other Details:
Pool Length: 50 metres
Pool Depth: 1.2 to 2.0 metres
Pool Setting: Outdoor
Address: Lot No. 4, Persiaran Perkilangan, Section 21, 40300 Shah Alam, Selangor Darul Ehsan, Malaysia.
Open Hours:
Tuesdays to Fridays
5:00 - 7:30 pm
8:00 - 10:30 pm
Saturdays & Public Holidays
8:00 - 10:30 am
11:00 am - 1:30 pm
2:00 - 4:30 pm
5:00 - 7:30 pm
8:00 - 10:30 pm
Sundays
8:00 - 10:30 am
11:30 am - 2:00 pm
3:00 - 5:30 pm
6:30 - 9:00 pm
Entry Fees:
Children (4 years and below): Free
Children (5 to 12 years): Tuesdays to Fridays RM2.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM3.00
Adults (13 to 54 years): Tuesdays to Fridays RM3.00, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM4.00
Persons With Disabilities: Tuesdays to Fridays RM2.50, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM3.50
Senior Citizens (55 years and above): Tuesdays to Fridays RM2.50, Saturdays, Sundays & Public Holidays RM3.50
Other Details:
Pool Length: 50 metres
Pool Depth: 1.2 to 2.0 metres
Pool Setting: Outdoor
Monday, April 23, 2012
Translation Exercise: Politics Article
Homework from the General Translation Course (Intensive) done in 2005. Revisited this one and made a change to some of the words I originally used. The revised translation is as follows:
Homework
Kerja rumah
Translation exercise
Latihan terjemahan
Politik/Rencana
Politics/Article
Major confrontation between governments and religious fundamentalists are increasingly prevalent in modern societies.
Perbalahan antara pemerintah dan golongan fundamentalis agama semakin kerap dalam masyarakat moden.
Some states are opposing Islam as a 'power play'. I do not believe this strategy of outlawing religious movements and persecuting citizens on the basis of their religious convictions is effective.
Sesetengah negara menentang Islam atas alasan 'permainan kuasa'. Saya tidak percaya strategi mengharamkan gerakan agama dan menindas rakyat atas pegangan agama adalah berkesan.
Indeed, fanning the flames of passion in relation to the issues of religion, in this way, is bound to result in a backlash by the religious sections of society.
Sememangnya, mengipas api semangat berkaitan isu agama dengan cara ini pasti mencetuskan serangan balik daripada golongan masyarakat yang kuat pegangan agama.
One does not want 'to throw the baby out with the bath water'. I think it is absurd and senseless to pursue a tough policy on religion, on Islam, because of the fear of extremism and aggressive fundamentalism.
Usahlah kita 'marahkan nyamuk bakar kelambu'. Pada pendapat saya, tidak wajar dan tidak masuk akal untuk mengamalkan polisi ketat terhadap agama Islam kerana takut akan ekstremisme dan fundamentalisme ganas.
It is worth noting that contemporary history provides a number of good examples where religion and secular authority not only co-exist but also blend harmoniously the canons of Islam with secular statehood in the management of the country.
Harus diketahui bahawa sejarah semasa mempunyai beberapa contoh baik di mana pihak berkuasa agama dan sekular bukan sahaja wujud bersama-sama tetapi juga gabungkan dengan harmoni kanun Islam dengan prinsip negara sekular dalam pengurusan negara.
(Excerpt from The Critical Decade - Nursultan Nazarbayev (2003) - Chapter 2, pg. 56-57)
Homework
Kerja rumah
Translation exercise
Latihan terjemahan
Politik/Rencana
Politics/Article
Major confrontation between governments and religious fundamentalists are increasingly prevalent in modern societies.
Perbalahan antara pemerintah dan golongan fundamentalis agama semakin kerap dalam masyarakat moden.
Some states are opposing Islam as a 'power play'. I do not believe this strategy of outlawing religious movements and persecuting citizens on the basis of their religious convictions is effective.
Sesetengah negara menentang Islam atas alasan 'permainan kuasa'. Saya tidak percaya strategi mengharamkan gerakan agama dan menindas rakyat atas pegangan agama adalah berkesan.
Indeed, fanning the flames of passion in relation to the issues of religion, in this way, is bound to result in a backlash by the religious sections of society.
Sememangnya, mengipas api semangat berkaitan isu agama dengan cara ini pasti mencetuskan serangan balik daripada golongan masyarakat yang kuat pegangan agama.
One does not want 'to throw the baby out with the bath water'. I think it is absurd and senseless to pursue a tough policy on religion, on Islam, because of the fear of extremism and aggressive fundamentalism.
Usahlah kita 'marahkan nyamuk bakar kelambu'. Pada pendapat saya, tidak wajar dan tidak masuk akal untuk mengamalkan polisi ketat terhadap agama Islam kerana takut akan ekstremisme dan fundamentalisme ganas.
It is worth noting that contemporary history provides a number of good examples where religion and secular authority not only co-exist but also blend harmoniously the canons of Islam with secular statehood in the management of the country.
Harus diketahui bahawa sejarah semasa mempunyai beberapa contoh baik di mana pihak berkuasa agama dan sekular bukan sahaja wujud bersama-sama tetapi juga gabungkan dengan harmoni kanun Islam dengan prinsip negara sekular dalam pengurusan negara.
(Excerpt from The Critical Decade - Nursultan Nazarbayev (2003) - Chapter 2, pg. 56-57)
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Rediscover The Missing Spark
I just looked at some articles I wrote for publication years ago. Comparing them to more recent works, they seem to express a mood that has since gone missing. I need to rediscover the spark that makes them tick.
It's the cheer, optimism, and spirit that I need to rediscover. The flame snuffed out by a series of unfortunate events awaits rekindling. What could be the key? A new environment? A new beginning? A new way of thinking?
Chatted with a good old friend of mine who gave me some words of advice. Sometimes, it's not about going for what we love to do but unable to handle due to one reason or another. It may help to do something that we may not like at first but are able to handle, then see how things go from there.
Makes sense. I tell myself to find out as much as possible about the setting, environment, expectations, requirements and so on. Then take a step back and evaluate carefully. As I was advised to by someone close to my heart, "be more selective with..." Yes, it rings true.
At the same time there will be a lot of conflicting messages bombarding me from various sources. The way to sift through them relies on one's ability to discern what is truth and what is propaganda. May I see through deception and inaccuracy yet be able to accept the truth and work around it.
It's the cheer, optimism, and spirit that I need to rediscover. The flame snuffed out by a series of unfortunate events awaits rekindling. What could be the key? A new environment? A new beginning? A new way of thinking?
Chatted with a good old friend of mine who gave me some words of advice. Sometimes, it's not about going for what we love to do but unable to handle due to one reason or another. It may help to do something that we may not like at first but are able to handle, then see how things go from there.
Makes sense. I tell myself to find out as much as possible about the setting, environment, expectations, requirements and so on. Then take a step back and evaluate carefully. As I was advised to by someone close to my heart, "be more selective with..." Yes, it rings true.
At the same time there will be a lot of conflicting messages bombarding me from various sources. The way to sift through them relies on one's ability to discern what is truth and what is propaganda. May I see through deception and inaccuracy yet be able to accept the truth and work around it.
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Spring Equinox 2012
Today, 20 March 2012 is the Spring Equinox in the Northern Hemisphere, and Autumn Equinox in the Southern Hemisphere. The sun rises exactly in the East at 90° and sets exactly in the West at 270°. Where I am in Kuala Lumpur, the sun will be near zenith at 1:21 pm at 87° above the southern horizon.
The direction of the shadows at sunrise shall indicate the East-West direction. So from what I see in the garden, my front gate is not exactly facing East, it's a couple of degrees towards East by South.
Note that due to the earth's axial tilt, there are only 2 days in a year where the sun rises precisely due east and sets precisely due west.
The direction of the shadows at sunrise shall indicate the East-West direction. So from what I see in the garden, my front gate is not exactly facing East, it's a couple of degrees towards East by South.
Note that due to the earth's axial tilt, there are only 2 days in a year where the sun rises precisely due east and sets precisely due west.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Funeral: Deja Vu & The Feeling Of Having To Be There
On Tuesday, 6 March 2012, I went to a place I last visited in March 2010: Xiao En Centre 孝恩馆. A salsera had passed away in tragic circumstances. She sustained severe head injuries in a car accident. I do not have any other details about the accident, but it definitely had a great negative impact. And she's only 25, so young with a lifetime ahead to look forward to. It will take time for the family members to heal from the grief.
She was a protege of a friend of mine in the salsa scene who has since moved away from KL. Yet I never had the chance to speak with her or dance with her. We went to different dance schools, mixed with different groups, frequented different venues so never got to meet. Now I shall never get to dance with her anymore.
So I can't say I know her. Not even a hi-bye acquaintance. Yet when news spread of her funeral, I felt I had to attend. I just had to be there. Something like lending a hand to support a cause in need. Can't really describe the feeling. Perhaps it's just me and my nature, as I can be moved in ways not common to other people. But of course I won't tell just anyone, because in this world many people will use what they know about you against you. That's the harsh reality of this world which I don't think I'll ever be on concilliatory terms with.
That evening after work, I headed home and had dinner. Followed my brother in his car, managed to get a basement parking spot. Walked up to the very place where Gung Gung's 公公 wake took place, almost two years to the day he passed away. It felt hauntingly familiar. Of all the memories, one that stands out was bumping into Architect Lee Chor Wah by chance as he was attending a funeral there. Ah, those were the days of another magazine. Time to get back on track.
A sombre mood filled the atmosphere. Teary eyes. Sobs. Hushed voices. I estimated 150-200 people at the time I arrived. So many people came to pay their last respects. Since it was a Christian funeral, it felt different from a Taoist or Buddhist funeral mainly due to the absence of joss sticks and "da jaai 打斋".
My brother and I walked to the coffin and spent some moments in contemplation and respect for the deceased. Flowers were everywhere - she liked flowers. Make-up set and some other items were on the coffin too. Must be things that belonged to her or she liked very much. These brought back memories of Porpor's 婆婆 cremation, we cremated some of her study books together with her since she really wanted to study despite her age and circumstances.
I did go up to the viewing portal, taking one last look at her in her state of eternal rest. Her face seemed a bit swollen, most likely caused by the injuries, and the upper left of her skull appeared caved in. I felt sad, imagining the severity of her wounds, and thought the impact must have been real hard. Otherwise she looked peaceful, nicely made up, and sleeping. Memories of Gung Gung 公公 came back.
Next we queued up for the "pak kam" 白金 offering and guestbook signing. No doubt money can't buy back life, but it's a gesture from the visitors' side to help defray the cost of the funeral. And then received the customary small red packet with a sweet inside.
We met some salsa acquaintances there, mostly from her salsa school and those who knew her for some time. Chatted briefly with some of them, and a common thread of thought was, such an unexpected incident and she's gone. I could see the tears in some of their eyes. The feeling of sadness is very real. Who else came - relatives, cell group members, friends from various times in her life, and so on.
All in all the occasion felt gloomy and subdued with an underlying current of deep sorrow. Yet it evoked something in me, and made me go out to take action towards closure. Yes, to end one thing and move on to another.
She was a protege of a friend of mine in the salsa scene who has since moved away from KL. Yet I never had the chance to speak with her or dance with her. We went to different dance schools, mixed with different groups, frequented different venues so never got to meet. Now I shall never get to dance with her anymore.
So I can't say I know her. Not even a hi-bye acquaintance. Yet when news spread of her funeral, I felt I had to attend. I just had to be there. Something like lending a hand to support a cause in need. Can't really describe the feeling. Perhaps it's just me and my nature, as I can be moved in ways not common to other people. But of course I won't tell just anyone, because in this world many people will use what they know about you against you. That's the harsh reality of this world which I don't think I'll ever be on concilliatory terms with.
That evening after work, I headed home and had dinner. Followed my brother in his car, managed to get a basement parking spot. Walked up to the very place where Gung Gung's 公公 wake took place, almost two years to the day he passed away. It felt hauntingly familiar. Of all the memories, one that stands out was bumping into Architect Lee Chor Wah by chance as he was attending a funeral there. Ah, those were the days of another magazine. Time to get back on track.
A sombre mood filled the atmosphere. Teary eyes. Sobs. Hushed voices. I estimated 150-200 people at the time I arrived. So many people came to pay their last respects. Since it was a Christian funeral, it felt different from a Taoist or Buddhist funeral mainly due to the absence of joss sticks and "da jaai 打斋".
My brother and I walked to the coffin and spent some moments in contemplation and respect for the deceased. Flowers were everywhere - she liked flowers. Make-up set and some other items were on the coffin too. Must be things that belonged to her or she liked very much. These brought back memories of Porpor's 婆婆 cremation, we cremated some of her study books together with her since she really wanted to study despite her age and circumstances.
I did go up to the viewing portal, taking one last look at her in her state of eternal rest. Her face seemed a bit swollen, most likely caused by the injuries, and the upper left of her skull appeared caved in. I felt sad, imagining the severity of her wounds, and thought the impact must have been real hard. Otherwise she looked peaceful, nicely made up, and sleeping. Memories of Gung Gung 公公 came back.
Next we queued up for the "pak kam" 白金 offering and guestbook signing. No doubt money can't buy back life, but it's a gesture from the visitors' side to help defray the cost of the funeral. And then received the customary small red packet with a sweet inside.
We met some salsa acquaintances there, mostly from her salsa school and those who knew her for some time. Chatted briefly with some of them, and a common thread of thought was, such an unexpected incident and she's gone. I could see the tears in some of their eyes. The feeling of sadness is very real. Who else came - relatives, cell group members, friends from various times in her life, and so on.
All in all the occasion felt gloomy and subdued with an underlying current of deep sorrow. Yet it evoked something in me, and made me go out to take action towards closure. Yes, to end one thing and move on to another.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Leap Day 2012
Quickie entrie for this special day. Good appetite after a refreshing gym session. Dropped by Popular and MPH bookstores unplanned. Skipped the massive traffic jam by anticipating it and taking alternative routes home. Phew :) Goodbye, Leap Day, and see you again 4 years from now.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Cheerful Smile
Twelve years ago, in New York City, an acquaintance commented that when I smile, it lights up the whole room. Today, someone mentioned "Cheerful like you" and it brought back memories of me smiling genuinely with both eyes and face. Someone believes I can get back my cheer factor. There's still hope in the midst of all this madness.
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Mid-February 2012 Update
Now it's the middle of February and time to update this blog. The past couple of months have been tumultous, to say the least. I wish I had better news to tell, but it wasn't meant to be. Tons of disillusionment and bad feelings came together at once. It's been many years since I last felt this way. And it's not something easy to talk about.
People say "time will heal". I don't know how long that'll take in my case. From personal experience, a lot of things that worked with other people don't work for me. The disconnect is something not easily described or explained. What works for other people doesn't necessarily work for me and vice versa.
On the bright side, the few people truly close to me are doing well and I'm happy for them. At least I know they have succeeded to a great extent. As for me, I can't say the same. All I can say is that I made some wrong choices and paid the price of losing my happiness, optimism, and cheer factor. I need to get these three things back, somehow.
Any changes? Yes, in some ways. I gave up a hobby I used to enjoy even during times of trouble and stress. This hobby sustained my sanity during a time of great uncertainty and loneliness. Not anymore. Now it only brings back memories of disappointment, failure, and heartbreak. I told myself I shall not go and participate in it unless either one of two conditions are fulfilled. Condition One is fulfillable but not in my hands. Chances of Condition Two being fulfilled are less than me winning the lottery. As long as neither condition is fulfilled, I'm not going.
There's also a certain type of event which many people look forward to, but I told myself I won't go for it this year. For this one, I would make some exceptions, depending on the people involved and whether going there would remind me of disappointment, failure, and heartbreak or not. I see one upcoming exception I'll make, but as for the others chances aren't so high.
And if anyone is wondering what I'm talking about here, well, only those who really know me would know. Those who don't, won't. Alright that's all folks for today. "Have a great weekend peeps" (quote borrowed from someone I used to know, but no longer keep in touch).
[Note: No Cantonese version for this post. I've neither the time nor the energy to create/think/compose/do up the Cantonese translation. Drained.]
People say "time will heal". I don't know how long that'll take in my case. From personal experience, a lot of things that worked with other people don't work for me. The disconnect is something not easily described or explained. What works for other people doesn't necessarily work for me and vice versa.
On the bright side, the few people truly close to me are doing well and I'm happy for them. At least I know they have succeeded to a great extent. As for me, I can't say the same. All I can say is that I made some wrong choices and paid the price of losing my happiness, optimism, and cheer factor. I need to get these three things back, somehow.
Any changes? Yes, in some ways. I gave up a hobby I used to enjoy even during times of trouble and stress. This hobby sustained my sanity during a time of great uncertainty and loneliness. Not anymore. Now it only brings back memories of disappointment, failure, and heartbreak. I told myself I shall not go and participate in it unless either one of two conditions are fulfilled. Condition One is fulfillable but not in my hands. Chances of Condition Two being fulfilled are less than me winning the lottery. As long as neither condition is fulfilled, I'm not going.
There's also a certain type of event which many people look forward to, but I told myself I won't go for it this year. For this one, I would make some exceptions, depending on the people involved and whether going there would remind me of disappointment, failure, and heartbreak or not. I see one upcoming exception I'll make, but as for the others chances aren't so high.
And if anyone is wondering what I'm talking about here, well, only those who really know me would know. Those who don't, won't. Alright that's all folks for today. "Have a great weekend peeps" (quote borrowed from someone I used to know, but no longer keep in touch).
[Note: No Cantonese version for this post. I've neither the time nor the energy to create/think/compose/do up the Cantonese translation. Drained.]
Sunday, January 22, 2012
No Mood To Celebrate 冇心情慶祝
Today is the day before Chinese New Year in the Gregorian Year 2012. I should be feeling happy, right? Yet I'm not. Unlike the festive seasons of a few years ago, somehow this year I don't feel like celebrating anything. Not even the most recent Christmas and New Year.
I don't know if this is a temporary setback or a state of regression. I do remember that some years ago there was a time when celebrations and festivals meant nothing to me. Because I was very down and hurting inside due to certain issues. Then came a point when my life changed for the better and I started celebrating again, looking forward to each festival.
Even as "recent" as two years ago I was happy to celebrate. I felt optimism and eagerness. But was it due to ignorance? In the two years after that, I went through some disasters. That really caused deep hurt not of the physical type but rather the inner type. I don't think I've fully recovered while I'm writing this blog post.
The wise say, when you have to move on, move on. Yet there's something about me that holds me back. It's sentimentality and the memories still fresh in mind.
Some who talk to me, manage to help somewhat, a few who do, end up making things worse. That's why I rather not talk to some people. As the saying goes, those who really know you, know you; those who don't, don't know any better.
今日係除夕。應該開心嗎，呵？不過唔係喎。唔係好似幾年前嘅節日，今年我乜都唔想慶祝。正話過咗嘅聖誕節同埋公曆新年都冇慶祝到。
我唔知呢個情況係暫時或者真係退步。我記得幾年前有一段時間乜嘢乜嘢節日慶祝對我冇意思。嗰陣時我好傷心好激心為咗幾件事。然後我嘅生活變好咗，有啲事情有進步，所以開始慶祝每個節日。
兩年前我仲係好開心慶祝。覺得有樂觀有熱心。但係。。唔通我真係無知？最近嘅兩年，我面對唔少災難。整到我好痛，唔係肉體上嘅痛，係內心嘅痛。而家寫緊呢個部落格發佈嘅時間，我好似未好嗮。
有智慧嘅人講：唔好再鑽牛角尖。但係有啲嘢我仲係過唔到。係感傷同埋好清楚嘅記憶。
有啲人同我傾偈，可以幫到，幾個噉樣做，點知呢就越整越衰。所以呢，一啲人我唔想同佢哋講嘢。嗰啲真係識得我就會了解我，嗰啲唔識嘅呢，唔會識。
*NOTE: In case of any discrepancy between the English and the Cantonese version of this blog post, the English version shall prevail. I'm not good at expressing myself in Cantonese or any form of Chinese, written or spoken. / 如果英文版及中文（廣州白話）版有任何差異，一切以英文版為準。我唔係好識用廣州白話或者任何中文嘅語言，無論係話或者文。
I don't know if this is a temporary setback or a state of regression. I do remember that some years ago there was a time when celebrations and festivals meant nothing to me. Because I was very down and hurting inside due to certain issues. Then came a point when my life changed for the better and I started celebrating again, looking forward to each festival.
Even as "recent" as two years ago I was happy to celebrate. I felt optimism and eagerness. But was it due to ignorance? In the two years after that, I went through some disasters. That really caused deep hurt not of the physical type but rather the inner type. I don't think I've fully recovered while I'm writing this blog post.
The wise say, when you have to move on, move on. Yet there's something about me that holds me back. It's sentimentality and the memories still fresh in mind.
Some who talk to me, manage to help somewhat, a few who do, end up making things worse. That's why I rather not talk to some people. As the saying goes, those who really know you, know you; those who don't, don't know any better.
今日係除夕。應該開心嗎，呵？不過唔係喎。唔係好似幾年前嘅節日，今年我乜都唔想慶祝。正話過咗嘅聖誕節同埋公曆新年都冇慶祝到。
我唔知呢個情況係暫時或者真係退步。我記得幾年前有一段時間乜嘢乜嘢節日慶祝對我冇意思。嗰陣時我好傷心好激心為咗幾件事。然後我嘅生活變好咗，有啲事情有進步，所以開始慶祝每個節日。
兩年前我仲係好開心慶祝。覺得有樂觀有熱心。但係。。唔通我真係無知？最近嘅兩年，我面對唔少災難。整到我好痛，唔係肉體上嘅痛，係內心嘅痛。而家寫緊呢個部落格發佈嘅時間，我好似未好嗮。
有智慧嘅人講：唔好再鑽牛角尖。但係有啲嘢我仲係過唔到。係感傷同埋好清楚嘅記憶。
有啲人同我傾偈，可以幫到，幾個噉樣做，點知呢就越整越衰。所以呢，一啲人我唔想同佢哋講嘢。嗰啲真係識得我就會了解我，嗰啲唔識嘅呢，唔會識。
*NOTE: In case of any discrepancy between the English and the Cantonese version of this blog post, the English version shall prevail. I'm not good at expressing myself in Cantonese or any form of Chinese, written or spoken. / 如果英文版及中文（廣州白話）版有任何差異，一切以英文版為準。我唔係好識用廣州白話或者任何中文嘅語言，無論係話或者文。
Sunday, January 1, 2012
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